He’d been her first
love—only love, really—and it seemed
as if she’d known him forever. What a dork he was in middle school, and then
he’d turned into a handsome teenager. They’d dated exclusively since her
seventeenth birthday. He’d been a part of all her high school
experiences—homecoming celebrations, football games, Saturdays at the lake.
Photos of them both filled her mom’s albums and the pages of her diary, both
records of an idyllic time. The memory of the first time they’d made love
intruded—nestled together on his crumpled bedspread, surrounded by walls of
tennis trophies, while his parents were out for the evening. They’d both been
virgins, nervous and unsure, but she’d been so certain of his love that she’d
made the first move. Her soul mate…or so she’d thought.
***
Writers hanging out with writers -- a good time with a great group of people. Check out excerpts from other Weekend Writing Warriors HERE.
A lot of us have had guys like Rick in our pasts. I hate "my Rick" all over again when I read about him in a novel like Bluebonnets for Elly. It's a great book.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kell! I'm glad you could relate, even though I'm sorry you had a "Rick" in your past.
DeleteOh, yes, this excerpt resonates with me! Thanks for sharing...and I must try this Weekend Warriors.
ReplyDeleteIt's a good group, Laurel-Rain. You'll get lots of good feedback.
DeleteI think most women have had a Rick in their lives...or some version of him. It's just one more reason that I loved the book :)
ReplyDeleteToo bad we've had to experience that, isn't it? But then it makes us really appreciate a good guy when he comes along.
DeleteNice job of introducing back-story, and building Elly's character, Sandra. :-) It's easy to empathize with her,now.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Teresa. That was my intent.
DeleteExcellent excerpt, very relatable, and also leaves me wondering what he called her about. Well done!
ReplyDeleteShe's wondering why he called too! I'm glad you picked up on that.
DeleteSounds like she knew him considerably before they started going steady.
ReplyDeleteShe did. But they were both awfully young.
DeleteI loved the details about their relationship history. No matter how bad the break up is, you can't seem to let go of what you had together. But I think she should put him behind her and move on. I couldn't forgive someone who did what he did.
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way. That's why she wouldn't even talk to him. She really didn't care what he had to say.
DeleteAww, it breaks my heart that he'd leave her after sharing so many memories and 'firsts' with her. Love your writing style! Wonderful flow to your words. Looking forward to reading more! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Evelyn.
DeleteSandra, your writing is wonderful evoking memories for so many readers. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you enjoyed today's post.
DeleteNice history there. They'll always be connected.
ReplyDeleteHeartbreaking that he didn't believe they were soul mates, too. Hopefully she'll move on. He certainly has and it would be difficult to go back now and forgive his betrayal. Well done snippet conveying her memories of what they had and the sad truth that the relationship is over.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I was trying to convey where Elly was coming from.
DeleteWe never really do turn off the "love" even if we come to realize it was all a fantasy, sigh.
ReplyDeleteShe is definitely someone we can relate to and that makes her all the more real to us.
And yes, why the heck is he calling her now?
I'm glad you're curious!
DeleteWonderful snippet, beautifully written. Her feelings are right there on the page, very relatable. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI want to yell, Don't get sucked in. Hang up the phone. LOL Great snippet.
ReplyDeleteLOL. I'm glad I was able to elicit such a strong response from you.
DeleteAw, that's such a lovely snippet, so realistic too. She needs to be strong and think of the way he treated her, it's too easy to only remember the good! Can't wait to read whether or not she hangs up on him!
ReplyDeleteVery nice, resonates with the emotion of lost love. Hope he deserves to win her back!
ReplyDeleteFirst loves always seem to remain tethered to our heart strings. And it seems so with Elly. If he's going to be the hero, how will she forgive him without appearing weak? Or will the real hero step in and save her... Great snippet!
ReplyDeleteI'm not telling what happens between Elly and Rick! I'm glad you enjoyed today's post.
DeleteIt's amazing how many folks are remembering their "Rick" and can feel so much empathy for the MC. Well written eight.
ReplyDeleteI'm amazed too! We're lucky if our "Ricks" come into our lives early on -- maybe in high school -- so we can learn from them.
DeleteNice description of better times. It helps to make him seem like a decent guy. But maybe he's not really!
ReplyDeleteVery evocative 8. Made me remember a "Rick" in my life.
ReplyDeleteI think most people have that person we thought was a soulmate, only to be disappointed down the line when it didn't last or the other person didn't care as much.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's part of growing up.
DeleteI think having a "Rick" is a universal constant . . . Come to think of it, my "Rick" was named Rick. Whoa . . . ;)
ReplyDeleteWhat a perfect account of that crazy, hormone-filled, awkwardness of first love. You can never really forget it, but you do often have to move on.
ReplyDeleteWow. Perfect? That's about the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.
Delete*sigh* The melancholic sadness in this snippet is palpable. It's interesting how with time we tend to remember the good and set aside the bad. Hopefully, she won't forget the pain Rick caused her and she'll move on to someone better and worthy of her!
ReplyDelete